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To be 100% clear: I didn't say that you must cut off family.
I specifically said the opposite: that it's OK not to fight. I said that I get it that some people don't want to cut their Trumpy relatives off because that is really, really hard. I also said that leaving a toxic family can be a good choice.
What I did say, is that if you aren't willing to do those hard things, don't you dare fix your fingers to hop online and blame Black people for anything.
https://hachyderm.io/@mekkaokereke/113472251609271026
1/N
I specifically gave the positive example of Jesse Watters' mom, who clearly didn't cut her son off. But he's not invited to Thanksgiving. She's not playing the "Just don't talk politics!" game that so many people play at Thanksgiving, so that they don't have to reckon with who's a hateful bigot.
I'm also pretty sure that Jesse Watters' mom isn't making excuses for her son, or cursing out Black men online like I got cursed out on this website before the election.
2/N
I had a friend in college who invited me to Thanksgiving. I said yes. She gave me a heads up that her grandma was "super old and from a different time, so she might say something racist." So I told her "Then heads up, your granny might be getting cursed out over the mashed potatoes and cranberry sauce." 
She was shocked, and asked if I was serious, and couldn't I just, y'know, ignore it? It's Thanksgiving!
I told her KYP (Know Your Personnel). You should've known that won't work with me.
3/N
The conversation devolved into nonsense about a different era, and me saying "Best I can do, is I'll curse her out like Malcolm Little would've or Huey Newton would've. I can even withhold the profanity and give granny the James Baldwin."
But ultimately, I let her know that it was nonsense for her to even ask that of me, and that no, I'm not coming to Thanksgiving, because I would 100% break granny down with words. The peace of her Thanksgiving table is not my concern. Fighting racism is.
4/N
A few days later, my friend's dad called me, and apologized that she had asked me that, and re-invited me to Thanksgiving, and said that I was 100% right, that I was welcome, and that his own mother was not, and that she could come only on two conditions:
1) If I allowed her to come. It was my call.
2) If she said anything ignorant during dinner, he would put her in the car, and drive her back to the nursing home, and she could eat her turkey on a paper plate alone.
I accepted.
5/N
I'm not saying that what her dad did was easy! It is super hard! Trust me, I understand how hard it was!
But this is what I mean when I say that I'm not that worried about nazis. Seriously, I think we pay them way too much mind. I'm much more concerned about the non-nazis I have around me when the nazis show up. I don't think we focus on them enough.
People unwilling to endure social discomfort to oppose racism aren't bad people! But people who are willing? Are much safer to be around.
6/6
@mekkaokereke I did something similar with fascists in my family. When invited to an event, I told the host that if the fascists were going to be there, and if they said something racist/fascist, I was probably going to ruin the event, and if they'd rather that not happen, I would not attend, and I gave them the choice. They chose not to have me attend, which told me all I needed to know.
